Latest Blog Posts
Ep 148: Divine Ecstatic Mystical Love with Andrew Harvey
I am hopelessly in love with life. With the force the burns in every atom and quark and neutrino. That great force of endless expansion, endless evolution. That's what bring me alive. - Andrew Harvey How can we fall madly in love with all of life? What can spiritual...
Ep 147: Reconciling the Desire and the Domestic With Sharon Costanzo
One thing that is important to recognize from the outset is that there is an inherent unfairness in relationships. I divide it into two types, the first is that we are imperfect human beings and there will be differences that cause friction in the relationship. And...
Ep 146: Living Apart Together with Vicki Larson
We shouldn't turn a romantic decision into an economic one. We should move in with someone if we love them and want to live with them, not because it saves us money. - Vicki Larson What are some different ways couples can Live Apart Together? What are some myths...
Ep 145: Living a Vibrant Life after Sexual Trauma with Charna Cassell
It's really important to have patience. Everyone has a different starting place. The first step is to accept what has happened and where we are starting from. Then we must understand that healing is a cyclical process. You can feel super healed, but then notice the...
Ep 144: Betrayal and Forgiveness with Bruce Chalmer
Unfortunately, betrayal is going to happen in every relationship. No matter how many rules you come up with, you can't come up with a perfect set of rules that will work for every situation that will come up. Life is unpredictable, including our own reactions to what...
Ep 143: Loving Without Losing Your Mind with Todd Baratz
We would be better served to think of finding a patner who is a team player, someone we can share a life with. Not someone who is going to solve our existential problems of what it means to be alive, not someone who is going to bring perfection and bliss into our...
Ep 142: How Stress Is Destroying Your Relationship with Elizabeth Earnshaw, MFT
Our job is to figure out how to lessen our reactions to things. And the first step is to notice our reactions, so that we can reflect on what happened and learn to regulate ourselves better. We can all improve our self-regulation toolbox. We can figure out what works...
Ep 141: Make your relationship STRONG with Kristal DeSantis
Studies have shown that the quality of your relatioships determines the quality of your life. So being able ot be strong as a human being includes being able to be strong in your relationships. - Kristal DeSantis What are the foundations for a STRONG relationship?...
Ep 140: The Wound of Love: Mysticism & Eroticism with David Odorisio, PhD
The wound of love is the love that inflicts the wound and departs. It's very interesting and very psychological connection between a God who loves and leaves. St. John of the Cross treats this as something to be desired, because it inflicts a wound that then leads to...
Ep 139: Improving Mother-Daughter Relationships with Debra Mandel, Ph.D.
A lack of responsibility in general is a problem in relationships. Because at those moments, I can say, that person isn't really in a relationship. Because to be in a relationship means to understand that you are relating, so that your behavior influences your...
Ep 138: Becoming Better Men with Eric FitzMedrud, PhD
We can create a value shift in our society where it's more important to us that you are a good human being, than you create good art. It's more important that you are a good parent to your kids, than a successful person in your career. And men that feel they are under...
Ep 137: Overcoming Anxious Attachment with Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD
People who have insecure attachment styles are more vulnerable to feeling disrupted in their lives, they on average are more prone to distress, negavity, anxiety, and depression. So what happens when people have more insecure attachment styles is that they are more...
Ep 136: All About Limerence with Thais Gibson, PhD
Limerence is basically this state of mind where someone is obsessively infatuated with another person, and constantly thinks about them to the point where it affects their daily life in a negative way. The biggest difference between limerence and infatuation is the...
Ep 135: Speaking From the Heart with Dr. Heather Browne, PsyD, LMFT
When people say they are ‘looking for their other half,’ it sounds nice, but as a therapist, I think 'Oh no!’ Because going into a relationship expecting the other person to complete you is not a good intention. Realize you already are complete, you are responsible...
Ep 134: Helping High-Conflict Couples with Jennine Estes Powell, LMFT and Jacqueline Wielick, LMFT
What we want to do is really find effective and efficient ways to bring up concerns that draws your partner close, and show up for each other in difficult moments. It's all about how to communicate in a way that is not guarded and defensive. - Jennine Estes Powell,...
Ep 133: Security After Separation with Aurisha Smolarski, LMFT
One of the key things that I always tell my co-parents is: being with is enough. Even if you have nothing to say or when you're kid is having a fit. Just be with them, calmly and quietly. Then your child will realize that their parent can handle them. They have a...
Ep 132: Love Hacks with Kelli Miller
Positive behavior begets positive behavior. So if your partner is seeing that you are being accountable and being kinder, by default, they start doing that too. If we're kind to our partner, they'll be kind to us. If we are stonewalling them, they'll get angry. What...
Ep 131: Recovering from Gaslighting with Dr. Amelia Kelley
What is gaslighting, and why has it become such a popular term? What should you do if you realize you are being gaslit? What’s the path to recovery? Find out the answers to these questions and more in this week's episode of The Learn to Love Podcast, where your host...
Ep 130: How to Have Healthy Conflict with Lisa Gray
Culturally, we have this idea that if we fall in love with someone and we really love them, that will be enough and love will carry us through. That's a great fantasy, but it's not the reality. Loving someone comes naturally, but having a good relationship is a skill....
Ep 129: Daring to Feel with Alexandra Roxo
Entering into the path of love is essentially investigating all places in your being that are not love. That means looking at all those fearful thoughts, doubts, insecurities, hidden traumas, and wounds. This path of the heart is one of entering in; it involves...
Ep 128: The Energy of Love with Sherianna Boyle
Love is a university energy that unites us all, it is the spirit of acceptance, the wisdom of letting go, the art of receiving understanding, and the beholder of grace. Getting in touch with this universal love will set you free from both your deepest fears and your...
Ep 127: Falling in Love Forever with Dr. Michael and Dr. Barbara Grossman
Is it possible to fall in love forever? What's happening biochemically when we fall in love? Why should we give up all complaints in our relationship? Find out the answers to these questions and more in this week's episode of The Learn to Love Podcast, where your host...
Ep 126: Being Enough as We Are with Scott Stabile
Love is an energy. It is a pure positive force in our world. Whenever we come from that place of love, we are the most at home and the most whole. - Scott Stabile What does self-love look like? How might we accept ourselves just as we are? Will unconditional love...
Ep 125: Loving Every Day with Dr. Alexandra Solomon
We make changes in micro-steps. People think that they'll go to therapy and be given the insight to these huge shifts in their lives, but it doesn't work that way. It's making one degree of shift and celebrating the hell out of it, it's a little bit of work every day....
Ep 124: Self-Empowerment in Family Systems with Elaine Carney Gibson
For the individual healing process, what's more important than the experience itself is the meaning they gave to it. With that meaning, how do they think and feel about themselves? It's important to help indiviudals get a new perspective on their experience, that will...