“The behaviors of secure attachment feel like this: I am here to create security for you. This relationship is a priority. When you are in distress, I’m here to help you alleviate that stress. As two people are committed to empower each other’s true self, you are my go-to person, particularly when I’m in distress.
That’s what the neuroscience of relationship and attachment research shows. We really want that sense of safety.
– Carista Luminare
What are the four attachment styles? What are some things we can do to build secure attachment? How can we support our partners who didn’t have the best childhoods?
Learn the answer to these questions and more in this week’s episode of the Learn to Love Podcast, where your host Zach Beach interviews counselor, consultant, and educator Carista Luminare on Building Secure Attachment.
Listen on:
Apple Podcasts || Stitcher || TuneIn || Google Podcasts|| Spotify || Castbox
about carista luminare:
Carista Luminare, Ph.D., has more than 40 years experience as a counselor, consultant and educator to individuals, couples and families. In her counseling practice, she integrates her lifelong research on early bonding patterns and how they impact our identity and our adult relationship dynamics.
Her powerful life-changing programs bring participants into direct experience and embodiment of their True Self. Carista has developed a comprehensive holistic parenting methodology, a leading-edge evolutionary leadership program, and a practical approach for couples to rewire their insecure bonding patterns into a secure functioning relationship.
After graduating from Harvard University in Psychology and Social Relations in 1978, and completing her post-graduate degrees, Carista pioneered educational programs on early attachment that focused on preventing and repairing childhood developmental trauma. She is the author of the groundbreaking book, Parenting Begins Before Conception. She is certified in both the Gottman Method and Stan Tatkin’s PACT Institute.
Carista has lectured throughout the United States at conferences, hospitals, and universities, and has been featured in a variety of international teleseminars and media about early attachment and human development. She is a featured blog writer at YourTango.com. She is the co-founder and President of Luminary Leadership Institute, and co-creator of the programs offered at ConfusedAboutLove.com.
Carista is a mother, and step-mother, and she has used her approach with her own family and in her relationships with great success (including with her beloved partner, Lion Goodman!)
Stay Connected With Carista Luminare:
- https://confusedaboutlove.com/
- https://trueself.net/
- http://healingnarcissismandcodependency.com/
- https://www.luminaryleadership.net/
people mentioned in the show
- John Bowlby, pioneer of Attachment Theory
- Lion Goodman, Carista’s Husband and co-author of Creating on Purpose
- Amir Levine, author of Attached
- Stan Tatkin, author of Wired for Love and We Do
Sponsors
- This episode is sponsored by Listenable, your home for powerful, bite-sized audio courses authored by well‑loved experts. Use the discount code “zachbeach” for the first seven days on the platform for free. And while you’re at it, sign up for our How To Be a Better Partner Course.
Related Episodes
- Ep 11: Communication in Relationships with Stacy Lee, MFT
- Ep 4: Skills for Happy Relationships with Gigi Azmy
- Ep 3: Why You Will Choose the Wrong Person with Jourdan Blue
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